so ya.. upon recent reflection of my life i have come to the conclusion that i am one that would greatly benefit from journaling/blogging. i feel that i have such a.. non-devoted life rite now. that is.. i feel like im living in such a way where i rly put little to no effort into my relationship with God. to put things more harshly, one could probably say that i am living as a Sunday Christian. (altho in my defense, i do try and live a christ-like life even at skool..) but ya.. and like just thinking bout wut it means to be a servant of God.. He calls us to devote our LIVES to Him. not just on sundays, not just sometimes, not just most of the time, but ALWAYS.
so lately there has been a resurgence in my daily bible reading and devos. i suppose that should be a good thing. but i dun rly feel like my heart is there.. dun rly FEEL like im spending that time with God. hai...
furthermore, i've been thinkin bout how badly i rly WANT God. and i realize that i don't want Him bad enough. there are things in this world that i long for more than i long for God and that's just twisted.. i just don't understand how to get my priorities straightened out.. i just wish i could replace my infatuations in wordly things with infatuation for God.
and that all sounds quite depressing and i have to admit that it has got me in a sorta >< mood.. so i will now attempt to cheer myself up by thinkin of happier things going on in my life rite now.
well.. currently no relationship problems.. so i guess that's a gud thing =)
lol and nothing else is rly that happy.. besides the fact that i have 47 days left of skool! YEYE
and that concludes my first blog since forever.. (hopefully now they'll come consistently)
feel free to bother me about not writing blogs.. or like reminding me to JUST INCASE
(assuming sum1's going to read this.. o.O)
-brian^^
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3 comments:
:)
i'm glad you're blogging again. : )
yay for blogging!
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